Monday, February 2, 2015

Following the Prompting of the Spirit

Hey Y'all,

This week has been great! I can't believe i have been on my mission for 1 month! Where has the time gone!! (not that far yet). I have seen already the impact the spirit has on being a missionary. Its crazy! This week i have had a harder time with being homesick and thoughts of doubt. It scared me and i could see that i was focusing on things that i shouldn't be focusing on. It made me mad. It made me pray harder and i started saying them out loud or whisper them so  could really hear and be sincere when i would pray and not sound like i was asking to much. I even tried being more grateful in my prayers and that really helped. I noticed my thoughts and spiritual moments were increasing and i felt the spirit more and was more open to recognizing that the spirit was there. More on that later! :)

This week started out with Zone conference on Tuesday! I have never done so many role plays in my life and thought that i was going to rip my hair out, but they weren't actually to bad once i just opened my mouth. Ha-ha. I have learned that the president kind of intimidates me a little and when he asked me to read a scripture i was shaking so bad!!! It was sad!! I was also sick and my head was full of air and so answering questions was not happening and so i was just in the back trying not to get called on. It was like the first day of school again. Other than me being weird it was great. I love the assistants and the Sister training leaders and the zone and district leaders. They all did a great job teaching but i especially loved the Assistants. Their are two sets of assistants, but the  companionship who i met on my first day in NC was the best. You could tell that they put a lot of work into the lesson and really prayed about what we needed to be taught. The spirit was definitely present.  They started the lesson out with one of the Elders bearing his testimony of Jesus Christ and then used what he said as a start of point in how Jesus Christ is our center on everything we do as a missionary. It was very good. I also loved sister Bernhisel's lesson on how we are as teachers. (she got her information in the January 2015 ensign on the talk on teacher ought to be from the general Sunday school presidency- read it) She talked about that we need to ask inspiring questions and to listen before we say anything or think to say anything (i struggle with that). Also to have them testify through the questions you ask so they can see that they do believe and do feel the spirit. She was amazing! My first Zone conference was great but i thought it would never end. It felt like the MTC but without the breaks every hour.

My week has been full of spiritual experiences. It started when we had companion study and was reading in preach my gospel n how to find people. I have been struggling with the idea that i don't need to worry about not understanding everything and knowing everything i just need to open my mouth and testify or allow the spirit to use me and i will find people to teach. We read in the Doctrine and Covenants and it said something like this. "Try not to obtain my word but to trust in me and i will give you words to say." When i read that it freaked me and out and I had this overwhelming feeling and i started to scary cry. My companion didn't know what to do with me. I quickly ran to our room and i prayed to Heavenly Father and thanking him for my answer. My next spiritual experience this week was when we visited a family in the ward and the daughter told us that she was in a car accident and that she was in a little pain only because when she and the other car hit she got all tense and was dealing with the pain. We talked about Grace from the talk "His Grace is Sufficient" (which is also another thing you should read) talking about that through the grace of the Lord we can do anything and keep failing but never stop trying. To never let a trail stop us from using the atonement and give up. They loved it and then two days latter we asked if the mom wanted to go with us on a lesson and she sad she couldn't because her daughter is in the hospital and has been diagnosed with Leukemia. We were both freaking out and were trying to know what to do and how we could help her and the family. The ward found out and we had millions in the ward come together to try and help them. They started a Facebook thing where everyone would wear orange and then post it on Facebook. It was crazy and everyone was doing it who could. She was told that it wasn't as severe as they thought but she would never be able to have kids and always have to be careful with the medicine of which she would always have to take. Yesterday at church EVERYONE came wearing some kind of orange and lots of love was shone. She was uplifted and you could see she was grateful for the love and strength we all gave her. Her mother bore her testimony and thanked everyone for the support. It was the best Sunday ever. I was glad that we gave that talk so that she could have that in her mind as she was going through this. Even the idea that she had an accident as bad as it was but that she was able to find the problem and get the help from the doctors. It could be worse later if they never found it. God really does make everything happen for a reason. (should be the title). My last spiritual experience for the week was on Saturday when we went to dinner with a single sister and talked about her brother who has Alzheimer and we talked about the situation and i just kept my mouth shut and boy that was stupid we went through dinner and i kept having this thought of "ask her about her brother." " continued to answer myself with it was none of my business." Finally we finished our dinner and desert and talked about her questions about the temple and then i got the prompting again. We started to clean the table and i just blurred "When was your brother diagnosed?" She hesitated for a minute and then she told us about her brothers story but talked about his conversion story. To tell a long story short. He already was getting worse but as the missionaries taught him he was able to learn the gospel and get baptized and then after he was baptized and was given the Holy Ghost he then got worse and he had to go to a Assisted living. I told her that was Gods way of letting receive the gospel in this life and he did through her. I told her that my family has been working with people like this for a long time and told her that  have worked with them and what wonderful people they are. I even told her i think Heavenly Father is letting him be like this because he is allowing him to show her that his time is coming and god is making it easier for the both of them. She told me that he only remembers being a child sometimes and that he s happy when he talks about that. Or when i visit him that's all he wants to talk about or something like that. I told her Heavenly Father wants you both to know he is allowing his illness to carry you both because he isn't suffering like he would if he had cancer or was in pain. He may not understand why he may get confused but that i see that god is allowing her to see him as a little child and is showing her that god is getting ready to take him but doing it in a way that she and him can deal with.

Well, i was freaking out and thought she was going to yell at me but we just stood their and watched her process what i had said. she then smiled and said i never thought of it that way. She then hugged me and thanked me for what i had said. I felt like i was saying something that didn't make sense. But i saw the peace of what i said helped her.

My week has been full of Heavenly Father and Christ's hand in my life and i am so grateful for the experiences i have received and have been able to grow from. Hope you have a great week and full of the Lords hand in guiding you! Till next Monday Love You all!


Sister Tayler Farr

No comments:

Post a Comment